All my life I had been looking for something
and everywhere I turned someone tried to tell me what it was.
I accepted their answers too, though they were often in contradiction and even self-contradictory.
I was naïve.
I was looking for myself and asking everyone except myself ,
questions which I, and only I, could answer.
It took me a long time and much painful boomeranging of my expectations to achieve a realization,
THAT I AM NOBODY BUT MYSELF :))
I will be whoever I wanted to be ..
I will live my life how I wanted it to be ..
I will be with someone whom I wanted to be with ..
I will choose the friends I wanted to have ..
and most of all ...
I will love someone whom i think deserve me most :)
Ive been existing in this world for almost 17 years ~ yet i feel like im not fully educated and well trained on how to live my life ..
I already experienced a lot of failures ~ how many times I fall down on my knees ~ yet i don't think I learned something..
I already have a lot of wounds and scars on my knees ~ yet i still get hurt whenever i fell down .. i think i can't accept the truth that there are things in this world that i can't change and i can't endure all the pain by myself ..
But I guess this failures complete me ~ not only because this is a part of growing up, but because each and everytime i fell down, I realize my mistakes and what am I going to do next time i encounter this and that ><
I'm just an ORDINARY girl .. living with ORDINARY people .. in this ORDINARY WORLD :)